Sometimes I Sing Before Breakfast…Cry Before Bed

Sometimes I Sing Before Breakfast…Cry Before Bed

 I struggle with depression.  There, I said it.

ksbj_features_thumb.jpgI used to hide and cry for hours in my closet, and spend weekends in bed.  I’ve conquered it with a lot of help, but I have to be honest with you today was a  tough day as my family is facing major changes with my transition from working mom to stay at home mom.    It’s the uncertainty of my future that’s making me feel “not-like-myself”.  I’ve gone in and out of depression for a while, but the difference now is I know what to do to get better.  I recognize when I start to hide from the world, I need to tell people, exercise, eat well, and I need to remember that God has healed me.   I need to cry out to him and remember all the great things going on in my life because of Him to break that cycle of depression.  

Psalm 28:6-7 (New Living Translation)

Praise the Lord!
      For he has heard my cry for mercy.
  The Lord is my strength and shield.
      I trust him with all my heart.
   He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy.
      I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.

That’s what I did this afternoon after telling my husband that I needed some help, and getting encouragement from my dear friends, Chante and Courtney, who called to check on me.  I put on music, held Emily in my arms, and danced around the room thanking God for this opportunity for answering my prayers.   He will do it for you too.  He can help you get out of this depression, don’t wallow in it, tell someone, get help, cry out to God. 

One of the desires of my heart is to help women through depression.  My prayer is that God will give me opportunities to publish a book and speak to women who are hurting and encourage them to make the decision to break the cycle. 


 I love you! 
Amanda

  • avatar image
    Susan Moore
    July 16th, 2007 at 4:43 am

    Through much prayer and Volunteer work and meds I have begun to get better…. Isolation was my solution for many years for depression and fear of letting anyone know.
    Know that you and Chuck will be missed in the Afternoons
    BUT when Emily talks about “Bubbles” on her wedding day you will know that you made the right decision to spend quality time with her and your Husband!

    Reply
  • avatar image
    Megan
    August 31st, 2007 at 3:33 pm

    I to struggle with depression. At a young age you will like your body is just giving up and you just feel lost. My doctor put me on meds to help but they made me feel even worse. Now just like you I have to exercise to keep my spirits up. I listen to KSBJ (and I miss you in the afternoons) to help me know that God is there. It is a daily struggle but together know that we can make it through the day one prayer at a time.

    Reply
  • avatar image
    Viece
    September 5th, 2007 at 9:36 am

    I used to feel guilty for struggling with depression. As a believer, what could I possibly have to feel depressed about? I was raised to believe that God could fix anything, and when He didn’t “fix” my sadness growing up, my depression got worse because I thought I didn’t have enough faith for Him to fix it. After a unsuccesssful (or successful, since I’m still here) suicide attempt, I have promised to talk to other people, God and my doctor before I allow myself to go there again. Exercise has also become a part of my routine and defintitely recognize the effects of not exercising.
    Thank you for sharing.

    Reply

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