The Single Mom & Failure: 3 Things You can Learn from Tom Brady

The Single Mom & Failure: 3 Things You can Learn from Tom Brady

The 3 things that Tom Brady can teach you about Overcoming Failure

Failing is inevitable.  How you choose to respond controls your destiny.  

King David in the Bible knew that too.  I love this desperate prayer of his “…I will walk with integrity; REDEEM me and be merciful and gracious to me.” -Psalm 26:11

He knew that he was called to serve God, he also knew he was incredibly flawed.  He was the runt of 7 brothers, always over looked, and constantly attacked.  He was by no means a perfect man.  He had an affair with a woman, got her pregnant, and committed murder.  Allegedly of course…

Tom Brady is not a perfect man either.  He’s the oldest quarterback in football and oh yeah and the whole deflated-football-getting-suspended-for-4-games-year?  Allegedly of course…

I think the Single Mom can relate to both men.  You might feel overlooked, undervalued, underestimated, and unfairly judged. I get it.  I’m over 40 too…  haha

I once went for a job interview at a radio station and was asked, “now what air shift time can you not take you know because you are a single mom?”  My jaw dropped, mouth open, response was, “any shift just like any man.  I may not have a wife, but I will hire a nanny.” I didn’t get that job.  It’s probably a good thing.

I was once asked in front of my children, “Are they all from the same father, I mean your youngest has a different Dad right?”  My jaw dropped, mouth open response was, “Uhhh.. they actually have the same father, but why would  you ask that?”  My mouth can get me in trouble.

This leads me to the 3 things the Single Mom can learn from Tom Brady.

1. Your Greatest Revenge is Success

Tom Brady has lost 2 Super Bowls.  Does anyone talk about that much?  Nope because he’s won 5.

Your greatest tool in your single mom success is your integrity.  David knew that.  Tom Brady knew that.  Both are flawed, but both have overcome.  We are all flawed.  Stop beating yourself up for your failures.  your best PR is your integrity.  No matter what mistakes you have made, or what has been done to you, hold your head up high, do your best to choose integrity from now on.  I have a friend that says, “keep your side of the street clean and don’t worry about the neighbors.”

Tom Brady moves forward.  He barely talks about the whole flat football saga.  He barely talks about it at all.  We could learn a lot from how Tom Brady keeps his mouth shut.  He is no whiner that’s for sure, he is a warrior.

The secret is to allow God to be your PR representative to the world.  His promise is to Redeem you.  That means to compensate for your faults.  Yes!  He is your great compensator. There’s nothing you need to say or do or post on Facebook.  Keep your mouth shut. We are a tribe of single mom warriors, not whiners. You walk with integrity and your reputation will follow.

2.  Failing is Inevitable. How you choose to respond controls your destiny

If Tom Brady would have whined and complained over  his losses and flat balls he would have lost our respect. If he would have continued to blame it on others in interviews and on Facebook and Twitter no one would be wearing a jersey with his name on the back.

I imagine if he would have been more of a whiner, he would no longer be a warrior in the NFL.  He wouldn’t have survived the scandal.  He would be retired.

I’m not ready to retire.  Just because your life didn’t turn out exactly the way you planned doesn’t mean you can’t continue to achieve your dreams.  Don’t allow failure of a relationship control the rest of your destiny.  Create a new vision for your life.  Don’t whine about it on Facebook, become a warrior for your children and design a beautiful life. I’ve whined and have learned that no one likes it. I have learned it turns most people away.  Use me as your cautionary tale.

Oh and by the way, waiting for the next guy to marry you isn’t the answer.  You must be strong on your own two feet first if you want the next relationship to be a healthy one.  I had a wise friend once tell me.  “Don’t be with a man that you NEED to be with, be with the one you GET to be with.”

3. Use Criticism to Motivate You

I don’t see a depressed Tom Brady.  He could have withered under the constant criticism of possibly cheating, but he just worked harder.  I imagine he is sick of all the sports commentators talking about his age and waiting for his body to deteriorate.  But, he is training smarter and eating cleaner.  I know I’m sick of it.  I’m 42 and feel I have a better grasp on my health and fitness then ever.

Instead of allowing criticisms and questions of others (like that job interview of mine or that rude comment from a mom at the kids school) derail your progress in your Single Mom Life use it as an extreme motivator to prove the skeptics wrong.

You don’t prove it with anger or bitterness. You prove it with your strength and success.  Instead of having those that you feel judge or underestimate you hear you complain, let them see you succeed.  Trust me they are watching. Aren’t we all watching the Super Bowl just to see if Tom Brady can do it again?

When I look back at my single mom life I can see a lot of faults and failures that could limit me.  For example.

-I was raising 3 kids on my own full time

-I was fired from my dream job while a single mom with a mortgage

-At 42 I still struggle with fear

It’s funny. Now I see those faults and failures listed above and I realize those are exactly the 3 things that have defined me and brought me success.  Having 3 kids full time gave me the closest relationship with my sunshines I could ever have asked for.  Getting fired was the catalyst for me starting and creating my life by design.  Seeing how God allowed me to keep my home through all of it is a daily example of how I do not have to be afraid.

No one cares about your faults if you work hard to overcome them.

Instead of allowing your so-called limitations from limiting you, allow them to propel you forward into truly loving the life you live.

Prayer this prayer of David to help you stay focused. “…I will walk with integrity; God REDEEM me and be merciful and gracious to me.” -Psalm 26:11

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