The Single Mom & The Second Chance

The Single Mom & The Second Chance

Dear fellow single mom, today, I want you to entertain this thought:

“Allow your LACK, to propel you forward instead of hold you back”

It sounds crazy doesn’t it?  Imagine your lack as the best thing that’s ever happened to you.  This is your second chance.

I would like you to stop using the things you lack as an excuse. I’m sure your lack is very real in your life. I don’t mean to be insensitive.  Maybe you are lacking…

-a home of your own because you’ve had to move back in with your parents
-an education because you stopped your when you fell in love
-your career because you stopped working when you had kids
-a dedicated husband by your side.

Check. Check. Check.

I feel you girl.  I understand. But, I want you to stop allowing this lack to keep you curled up in a ball and angry at the world.  I want to you to tackle this lack and propel you forward.

You wouldn’t be the first one. The Corinthians were very poor people.  They had nothing, but they gave. Paul, wrote this about their generosity and bravery:

“For in the midst of an ordeal of severe tribulation, their abundance of joy and their depth of poverty (together) have overflowed in wealth of lavish generosity on their part. For as I can bear witness, they gave according to their ability, yes, and BEYOND their ability; and they did it voluntarily.” (2 Cor:8:2-3)

What seems to be LACK in your life could be the very thing that opens the door to God’s limitless supply.

I have been trapped in depression for far too long because I “lacked” certain things as a single mom.  This morning it was storming, I drove my children to school instead of making them walk down the street, and I witnessed a scene that had me driving back home in tears.  My friend’s husband, crossed my path.  He didn’t see me. He was holding an umbrella, one arm around one daughter, the other holding his youngest daughter’s hand crossing the street to make sure they got to their classroom safely and stayed dry.  I then sent her a text telling her how blessed she is to have that man for her husband.

I cried because I want that for my daughters, and I want the help for myself too.  Instead of allowing it to bring tears of sadness, I cried tears of joy thanking God my friend has a good man that helps her, and thanking God that men like that exist still, and to hold out for one that will do the same for us.

Allow the lack in your life to give you the courage to wait longer to find God’s best for you instead of settling so quickly.

Allow the lack in your life to make you brave enough to go back to school to get the career that you’ve always dreamed of.

Allow the lack in your life to help you save enough money to buy your own home for you and your children.

There are no more excuses.  You will not utter the phrase, “I can’t do that because I’m a single mom”. Not. One. More. Time.  Instead you will allow your lack to propel you forward!

It wasn’t my divorce that was the most catastrophic event in my life.  I had another one after my divorce that almost ruined me.  I almost let it. I was a single mom with a mortgage and I unexpectedly lost my dream job.

The first thing I did was go into panic mode.  I called a realtor and we hatched a plan to sell my house as soon as possible so I could stay afloat while I searched for a new job.  He came over to help me get the home I was so proud of purchasing on my own for my children as a single mom ready to sell and had a roll of blue painters tape in his hand. He carefully went through the house and put little pieces of blue tape on the furniture and decorations that he felt I needed to remove to stage it and make the house sell quickly.

I lived for weeks walking around my house haunted by that blue tape.  While I frantically made phone calls and searched for jobs every single piece of that blue painters tape represented failure, that I was giving up my dreams.

I had another friend stop by and check on me during those dark days.  When she saw the tape everywhere she screamed at me, “WOULD YOU JUST TAKE THAT TAPE OFF AND FIGHT?!” She reminded me that God would not have given me this home for my children and I only to have it taken away.  She reminded me that my lack of a job could be the very thing that propels me forward into the bigger plan that God has for me.

I thought I lost my dream job, but in reality God was freeing me to go after a bigger dream.  I was complacent in comfort.  He loves to push us out of our comfort zones.  He doesn’t do it to make you miserable, he does it to bring you closet to Him.

My dear fellow single mom, you have been give a second chance.  You have the opportunity today to reinvent your life.  You can decide today to stop allowing lack to limit you and instead allow it to make you work hard to build the life that you have always dreamed of.

You are not held back by lack of money or a husband. You are held back because of your lack of faith. Believe that God can do what he says he can do.  He wants you to be able to have a life beyond your ability. Why?  So He can get the credit for it.  When people ask you, “how did you rebuild your life?” You will say God did it for me.  When people ask how in the world you do it all as a single mom, you will be able to say, I don’t do it by myself, God is with me.

He wants to use you as an example today of the second chance that all of us have when we choose to believe that there are no such things as lack and limitations.  How will you know what you are capable of with God by your side if you stay in your comfort zone and allow lack to hold  you back.

It’s only when you challenge you capabilities, that you finally discover them.

My dear, please be brave.  Take off the blue tape of failure on your life and start to live it.  Get your degree. Go back to your career. Save and buy your home for yourself.  Don’t you wait until you have  a new man to provide it all for you.  You have to learn to allow God to help you provide it for yourself and your sunshines.  Happy Second Chance my girl.  Have fun building the life that YOU want.

Father, help my fellow single mom to be brave and allow the lack in her life to propel her forward instead of hold her back!

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